5.12.2009

Benny Boy

It is going to be a very hard and sad day for my family, as my great Uncle Ben is succumbing to a severe case of double pneumonia. He is in the ICU on a ventilator and is struggling mightily even with all the assistance that machine provides. He was born with Down Syndrome, and my grandmother, aka Nanny, has taken care of him, her baby brother, his whole life, but particularly after their mother died many many years ago. He is her world, and watching them over the years has been so amazing and inspirational. I doubt there are many more impressive examples of loyalty. I've certainly never seen any.

When I was little, I remember being afraid of my Uncle Ben, as I imagine most small children would be unless they were constantly around people with Down Syndrome. As much as I didn't want to go "hug his neck," as I was instructed to, I was rightly made to by my parents. Nobody gives a more epic hug than Uncle Ben. They could last for an hour if you let it. I must have been in high school before I began to really appreciate and enjoy the scope of these hugs. It was then that I stopped pulling away after just a second or two and learned how to stay in the hug as long as he wanted.

I went up to Vicksburg to see him and my Nanny last week, and Nick and I are going to go up there this afternoon most likely. Nanny is making some incredibly hard end-of-life decisions probably as I type this. I am proud that my 2 aunts, nurses themselves, (also a study in the beauty of loyalty) are helping her and her sister, my great Aunt Martha, navigate some impossible choices. I know the priority will be a dignified and peaceful end. Please pray for calm reassurance, for my Nanny, that she is doing the right thing. Please pray for my Uncle Ben, that he will somehow feel all the love surrounding him right now.


Uncle Ben and Gus, Thanksgiving 2008

4 comments:

Libby said...

Oh Laura, this has just been breaking my heart for the past week or so. I can only hope for peace and comfort for your Uncle Ben, and for the whole family. I will keep praying.

Mom said...

What a precious, precious picture! Uncle Ben loved the babies, that's for sure. So sorry that Gus will not grow up to know this fine man. He was loved by all who knew him and never met a stranger. If you were around Benny boy, you were going to get a hug or a kiss on the hand (especially if you were of the female sex!!) He loved pretty girls. His passing from this life to eternity was the most peaceful end that I have ever experienced. God was merciful up to the very end, when He accepted Ben home. We love you, Uncle Ben.

Aunt Pam said...

I love this pic. It. He was so gentle and kind.Thanks Laura!

Cheesey Whiz said...

I'm so sorry for your loss and you will miss those neck hugs, but what memories you have! And...what a precious picture of Uncle Ben and Gus. You can show Gus this picture as he grows up and recall many stories to him and he will get to know Uncle Ben through your eyes.

Loving you! Aunt Judy