5.25.2010

She WHAT in all her WHATS??

It's a cliche for a reason. Many doctors have really really bad penmanship. I try to read all the recent progress notes regarding my patients, but certain doctors' notes I just skip right over, without the hope of ever interpreting them. If it's an actual order, of course I have no choice but to spend the time to figure out what he or she is telling me to do, usually with the help of other nurses and the secretary.

Recently, I was reading through notes on one of my patients by a doctor who I don't normally have too much trouble figuring out. But one sentence gave me pause. I thought, surely he didn't mean to say this... but what else could this be? This patient was in for stomach complaints. I settled on: "She farts in all her pants." And I lost it completely.

Very unprofessionally, I called my coworkers over to read this jewel of a note as I laughed hysterically and even had to leave the area for a moment to recollect myself. This doc doesn't have a reputation for always using the most technical medical jargon, but this was just absurd.

Oh how I laughed and laughed and was even a little proud of myself for finding such entertainment for all of us at the beginning of our long shift ahead. Of course, when I showed it to people, I read it to them aloud as I pointed to the writing. Once you plant the "she farts in all her pants" seed in someone's head, it's hard for them to see anything else. Later, I asked one of my coworkers, who had missed this scene completely, to read me that note and tell me what she thought it said.

"She hurts in all her parts."

Oh. Yeah. That makes a lot more sense.

3 comments:

Jill said...

Ha, I've been thru the same thing many times. Sometimes if you turn the orders upside down you can figure out what it says quicker. Neither "farts in all her pants" or "hurts in all her parts" is very professional sounding unless it was a direct quote from the patient. Ha. It's good to know that Docs everywhere are the same be it north or south. :) Your story gave me a chuckle for my day

Laura Sue said...

It was not in quotation marks, so it's not clear if it was a quote from the patient or not. But let's hope so!

Ashley said...

funny! but also scary considering sometimes these orders are pretty important! I just finished reading a book about medical mistakes and its on the brain! It said that its the 4th leading cause of death in America and that mostly its just from miscommunication- dr may be wrong about an order and the nurse, due to heirarchy stuff won't say anything. Scary stuff! Not to get heavy or anything :)